ADOPTION - OUR FIRST CHOICE!
 

Joe told me on our first official date at, Basi Italia, that his battle with cancer in college had significantly decreased his chances of ever having biological children*.  He’ll tell you that I didn’t bat an eyelash.  If I’m being honest, I wasn’t that girl who dreamed about being pregnant, but I HAVE always dreamed about being a mom.  As dinner continued, Joe shared that his dad and aunt were both adopted.  I also already knew that there are TONS of kids here in the US and around the world in need of loving parents and families.  From that moment, we’ve always considered adoption our first choice.  Normal first date conversation, right?!     

If you know anything about Joe, you wouldn’t be shocked to hear that he likes to explore ALL options before making a decision, regardless of size or scope.  [This is precisely why we still have a completely empty room on our first floor.  There are just so many desk options to choose from… but I digress!] The decision to pursue adoption as our first choice to start our family, was no exception.  In June 2016, after months of procrastinating and debate, we did finally meet with a reproductive health specialist to discuss the option of IVF.  We left our visit well informed, but it still did not change our decision to grow our family through adoption.  Joe and I are so incredibly fortunate that we didn’t come to the decision to adopt through the heartbreak of failed fertility treatments.  I feel a deep sense of gratitude that we were able to begin this journey from a place of positivity.  In a way, it almost feels simple. 

As I have shared our story over the years, many people – yes, close friends and family included - would respond back with “well you could always try IVF or a sperm donor.”  This advice was often accompanied with a sympathetic look or tone.  I am sure that these comments were well- intended, but to me, adoption is, and will never be a backup plan.  I totally understand that many people believe that they can only fulfill their dreams to parent by having biological children.  Though I can’t describe why, I’ve never felt that way.  In my heart, adoption feels no different. 

At the end of the day, this journey will inevitably consist of peaks and valleys and unexpected twists.   The one thing I am certain of is that I can’t wait to be a mom and snuggle a sweet little baby in my arms!

 

*Happy to report that Joe has been cancer free for TEN YEARS!!!!